IT Companies Full Names...just don't miss it.... :-)

1. NIIT: Not Interested in IT

2. WIPRO: Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output

3. HCL: Hidden Costs & Losses

4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions

5. INFOSYS: Inferior Offline Systems

6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping

7. BAAN : Beggars Association and Nerds

8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines

9. SATYAM: Sad and Tired Yelling Away Madly

10. PARAM : Puzzled and Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors

11. C-DOT: Coffee during Office Timings

12. AT&T: All Troubles & Terrible

13. CMC: Coffee, Meals and Comfort

14. DEC: Drifting & Exhausted Computers

15. BFL : Brainwash first and Let them go

17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.

18. PSI: Peculiar Symptoms of India
19. ORACLE: On-line Romance And Chatting with Lady Employees .

20. PATNI: Pathetic Appraisal Techniques, No Increments.

21. MASTEK: Mad and Stupid Technicians Enrooted to Kabaarkhana

22 . CAPGEMINI: C onverting A bsolute P rofessionals & GEM of I ndividuals

into N on-performing I diots

check this out u may like this...............
God created the donkey
and said to him. "You will be a donkey. You will work un-tiringly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years."
The donkey answered: "I will be a donkey, but to live 50 years is much. Give me only 20 years"God granted his wish. .........................................................................................
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
God created the dog
and said to him: "You will guard the house of man. You will be his best Friend. You will eat the scraps that he gives you and you will live 30 years.You will be a dog. "
The dog answered: "Sir, to live 30 years is too much,give me only 15 years. " God granted his wish. .........................................................................................
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God created the monkey
and said to him: "You will be a monkey. You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks. You will be amusing and you will live
20 years. "
The monkey answered: "To live 20 years is too much, give me only 10 years." God granted his wish. .........................................................................................
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Finally God created man ...
and said to him: "You will be man, the only rational creature on the face of the earth. You will use your intelligence to become master over all the animals. You will dominate the world and you will live 20 years."
Man responded: "Sir, I will be a man but to live only
20 years is very little, give me the 30 years that the donkey refused, the 15 years that the dog did not want and the 10 years the monkey refused." God granted man's wish .........................................................................................
And since then, man lives
20 years as a man ,
marries and spends
30 years like a donkey, working and carrying all the burdens on his back. Then when his children are grown, he lives 15 years like a dog taking care of the house and eating whatever is given to him, so that when he is old, he can retire and live 10 years like a monkey, going from house to house and from one son or daughter to another doing tricks to amuse his grandchildren.
That's Life.
Is'nt it ??????????

The Stock Market simply illustrated ... Is there a lesson here?

Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for Rs10.

The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them.

The man bought thousands at Rs10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He further announced that he would now buy at Rs20.

This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again. Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms.

The offer rate increased to Rs25 and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey let alone catch it.

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at Rs50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on behalf of him.

In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. "Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at Rs35 and when the man returns from the city , you can sell it to him for Rs50."

The villagers squeezed up with all their savings to buy the monkeys.

Then they never saw the man nor his assistant, only monkeys everywhere!!!!

Life Of A Man***************
Before Finding a Girl - Spiderman....
After Finding his Girl - Superman....
After the Engagement - Gentleman....
After the Marriage - Watchman....
10 years After Marriage -Doberman....

A TOUCHY STORY
It was the day of her son's XII results and she was so tensed. She sat beside him while he logged on the website with his registration no. "Ma", he screamed in excitement," I scored 1191, with centum in 4 subjects.

I cant believe it. " She kinda became numb in my excitement. Her eyes became wet. She kissed him on his forehead and smiled.

Soon they realized that he stood first in the state. Oh, her joy knew no bounds when Reporters and media persons soon swamped her house for interviews and photos. She was so honored to join him in the snaps.

She wanted to call her "wrong-number- friend" to tell him the news......She was so excited. He was someone whom she has known for more than 20 years.

She still did not remember when they became friends, but certainly cannot forget the first day he called her when she blasted him for giving her so many wrong calls.....after that he had called up a week later asking apology, for he had now got the right no of his friend whom he wanted to talk to . They spoke for an hour that day...even without knowing each other's names.
Though he kept pestering her to reveal her name she never did and so he kept a name...Sweety. She used to get so shy whenever he called her 'Sweety'. She was doing first year of BSc. Maths then, and he was a Computer Engineering
student.

From then he used to call her very often . They almost discussed everything ..

By the final year of her college, they probably were in love, but she had been cautious. She was in a dilemma whether to tell him. But what if he was of a different religion? Does she have the courage to talk to her parents about it? ........all these questions ran through her mind.

She decided tat she'll not talk to him thereafter. When he called next time she lied to him that she was going to Delhi for her post graduation. He gave her his office number and asked her to ring him up once she reach there.
She never called .......

A couple of months later her marriage got fixed with a guy of her parent's choice. She was not happy but she did not complain; rather accepted it as an obedient daughter. At times she felt she missed her wrong- number- friend...... .

Her hubby was a moody person; she has hardly spent any good time with him- but he was genuine indeed and never bothered her personal space. After 2 years they had a boy... Yet,she was not very happy with her married life... One day she happened to browse through her diary and found that she still had her old friend's office phone no that he had given her. she dialed it and spoke with him. He said he was married and got a kid too. She was happy for him though in the bottom of the heart she felt bad that she could not marry him.

From then she used to occasionally call him on that number. She never gave him hers as I felt that would put her in trouble.. And till today she almost shared everything with him including her relationship with her hubby..... today she was so happy and wanted to call him.

Just then she got a call. "Your husband met with an accident and died on the spot"

She banged the phone down. She broke. She did not call her friend.....She somehow started feeling guilty. She has never tried to talk to him properly when he was alive or moved close with him.... She felt that she had been a bad wife........

A couple of years passed and one day her son brought home a Bengali girl and said they wanted to get married. She got them married as she did not want her son to go through what she did.

She decided to give her son his father's room and started clearing it. There was a phone book. She gently opened it to find, "Wrong No Sweety -26579785"

God always puts the right numbers together. Its we who interpret it wrong!!!!!

TRY YOUR NAME AND SEE WHAT IT IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A: hot

B: loves people

C: humble

D: makes people laugh

E: has gorgeous eyes

F: people wild and crazy adore you

G: very outgoing

H: easy to fall in love with

I: loves to laugh and smile

J: is really sweet

K: really silly

L: smile to die for

M: intelligent

N: caring

O: has one of the best personalities ever

P: popular with all types of people

Q: a hypocrite

R: class bunker

S: cute

T: lucky

U: good looking

V: not judgmental

W: very broad minded

X: never let people tell you what to do

Y: is loved by everyone

Z: can be funny and dumb at time

Just for fun

You know you are an Internet Junkie when...




When asked to your address, your answer begins with http://

Instead of calling you to dinner, your spouse sends e-mail.

You chat with your fingers, not your mouth.

You use Netscape 8, and you check every week whether version 8 was released.

You know the difference between Java and Javascript.

Most of your friends have an @ in their names.

In order to watch CNN you move to www.cnn.com

On your business card the e-mail appears before the phone number.

You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com

You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.

You can perfectly imitate the sound pattern of your modem connecting to your ISP.

You can think of nineteen keystroke symbols that are far more clever than :-).

You are told about a new program, and you are disappointed to find that it is a TV program.

Not only do you check your email more often than your paper mail, but you remember your network address faster than your postal one.

You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way back to bed.

10 REASONS--- Y INDIANS CANNOT BE TERRORIST





1. We are always late we would have missed the flight.


2. Pretty girls on the plane would distract us!


3. We would talk loudly and bring attention to ourselves.



4. With food and drinks on the plane, we would forget why we're there.


5. We talk with our hands, therefore we would have to put our weapons down.


6. We would ALL want to fly the plane.


7. We would argue and start a fight in the plane.


8. We can't keep a secret, we would have told everyone a week before doing it.


9. We would have put our country's flag on the windshield.


10. We would all have fallen over each other to be in the photograph being taken by one of the hostages.

Women:A wife was not at home for a whole night. So, the next morning, she tells her husband that she stayed at her girlfriend's apartment overnight.The husband calls 10 of her best girlfriends and none of them confirm that.
Men:A husband was not at home for a whole night. So he tells his wife the next morning, that he stayed at his friend's apartment overnight.So the wife calls 10 of his best friends: 5 of them confirmed that he stayed at their apartments that night, and the other 5 are claiming that he still is there with them!
Conclusion : Men are better friends